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If I had to go back to the design table with the abilities locked in as they are, Id probably cost it at 2W or 1WW

Whatnot works especially well for: $1 starts Bulk singles Mystery lots Pack openings Slabs with active bidding Buyer giveaways Repeat-show communities Moving inventory quickly But here is the honest truth: Whatnot is not passive

This card plus Greenbelt Rampager nets you infinite ETB triggers and storm count, by the way

The biggest shot against the 2/2 is that it typically needs to survive a turn cycle before it can really start to generate value

Deadly Tempest Deadly Tempest is one of the best budget black board wipes MTG has created

You can set up an account easily enough for your kids, but if they are under 14, you will need to set up your own account as well